Fuzzy the poet.

[Fauxmage]

Actually, I don't know what's gotten into me. :dizzy: :D

[SinnerCal]

Limerickosis? :eek: :ill:

[Gliondrach]

In my sleep I have drunk deep of the kingly virtues royal
And they do seep into all my pores like holy unctuous oil.
I will debate
Until I'm sate
But with usurping imposters my hands I will not soil.

[Gliondrach]

On every side I am assailed, embattled,
But am I by this affected or rattled?
No, I am not
For it is my lot
As King to defend my honour from being tittle-tattled.

[Gliondrach]

From whence does your authority originate?
From usurping foreigners who came but late!
They were but thieves
Common as leaves
Who to my ancient bloodline can ne'er relate.

[Gliondrach]

I, as rightful King, do not with commoners' delusions deal.
I have more lofty concerns that to me do more appeal.
I am the King
So let all sing
In gratitude that my bloodline verily is my royal seal.

[thevegantwins]

I'm still leaning towards The Wench:flirt: in this battle.

[Gliondrach]

And what do you know about royalty?

[Gliondrach]

Cherie bravely protects each non-human friend
In protests and demos for years without end.
She fights for their Rights
By both days and nights
And against all threats she will them staunchly defend.

[Fauxmage]

The commoners have had their say,
The true Queen is winning the day.
Ignore the choice
Of the people's voice
At your own peril, I pray.

[Oracl]

I'm still leaning towards The Wench:flirt: in this battle.
The Wanker :pleer: is fighting back valiantly though! :rubchin:

[thevegantwins]

And what do you know about royalty?
Didn't you know that I am a descendant of Russian + Polish royalty? My ancestors were the first Jewish royal family in Europe. Oy vey! :princess: Unfortunately, they had to abdicate and run for their lives during the pogroms. They arrived in NYC broke and bedraggled and our family line hasn't recovered since.

[thevegantwins]

The limerick thread was fun and light
Showing off our wit, quick and bright
Not so much anymore
The talons are out, for sure
As poetic vegans engage in literary fight.

[Gliondrach]

I have no need to fight, I say,
For my rights are right any day.
Hail to me,
The king truly,
I easily keep all usurpers at bay.

[Gliondrach]

Members come and members go.
Where they go does anyone know?
We go on forever
Because we're clever
And slowly the forum begins to grow.

[Fauxmage]

The Isles need both Queen and King.
Let's join our royal bloodlines by marrying.
It won't be long ere
The Throne will need an heir.
Or would you prefer to keep fighting?

[veggiesosage]

Little do they know they waste their time
For power here is truly mine
Save your trouble and your strife
'Cause I am President for Life
A Republic! Here ends my rhyme!

:D

[Fauxmage]

A grumpy Dark Horse has joined the fray.
Thus the fight continues another day.
I must use all my wiles
To keep hold of my Isles.
Your Queen shall have her way!

[Blueshark]

There was an old woman from yonder,
Who thought prudent to bed with the younger,
She had the face of a mare,
Admired the udder of the fare,
Yet never need disguise in London!

[Gliondrach]

Didn't you know that I am a descendant of Russian + Polish royalty? My ancestors were the first Jewish royal family in Europe. Oy vey! :princess: Unfortunately, they had to abdicate and run for their lives during the pogroms. They arrived in NYC broke and bedraggled and our family line hasn't recovered since.

You could be the heir of king Solomon.

[Gliondrach]

There was an old woman from yonder,
Who thought prudent to bed with the younger,
She had the face of a mare,
Admired the udder of the fare,
Yet never need disguise in London!

What, I pray, is that supposed to mean?
Is it a reference to Liz the false queen?
You tempt the Tower
With each passing hour
And in there you'll be neither heard nor seen.

[Gliondrach]

A false president has thrown his hat into the ring,
The wench wants a compromise and is asking
A marriage convenient,
For me to be lenient.
But still it remains I am the rightful, annointed king.

[thevegantwins]

Alas, vegans young and old
Many tall tales have been told
We are all for one
Until our work is done
Cease now or hear me scold! :rollingpin:

[Blueshark]

There was an old codger, named Norman,
Tweed suits he wore swigging bourbon,
On streets he slept,
Little girls thus wept,
But in truth he was an orthodox Mormon!

[Fauxmage]

It is the duty of every King,
To provide an heir to the Throne by marrying
a Royal Princess
and commencing to bless
Their union with Royal offspring.

The moral is: If you don't want to get married and have babies, you can't be the King. :D

[paul]

The Isles need both Queen and King.
Let's join our royal bloodlines by marrying.
It won't be long ere
The Throne will need an heir.
Or would you prefer to keep fighting?

would this be the first Naked Vegan wedding :cheer: :dancerat: :luvbird: :luvbird:

[thevegantwins]

A proposal has been made by the fair Wench :flirt:
Will it be accepted by the noble British mensch (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mensch)?
Oh joy, peace in the Queendom
In this Land of Naked Vegan
Banish the necrotarians to their murderous, evil stench.

[Charmagne]

It is the duty of every King,
To provide an heir to the Throne by marrying
a Royal Princess
and commencing to bless
Their union with Royal offspring.

The moral is: If you don't want to get married and have babies, you can't be the King. :D

:rofl: :laugh: :rofl: :laugh: Oh this just conjures up all kinds of strange images!

[Gliondrach]

Kings after me will be elected, not born
For this is the new old rule I have sworn.
After I have gone
There'll be another one,
But in the meantime I have a crown to be worn.

In the old days kings were elected, sometimes from the king's family but not always.

[Gliondrach]

Good one, Yam Yam.

[thevegantwins]

Good one, Yam Yam.

Aren't you flattered, Martin that I referred to you as a mensch?

Will it be accepted by the noble British mensch?
I don't use that term often.

[Blueshark]

Good one, Yam Yam.

Ta Mr G.

In a forest once ranged a moose,
Who danced at stocks and noose,
One day arrived a letter,
Revealing antlers make fretter,
Henceforth her gallop confuse!

[Fauxmage]

In the old days kings were elected, sometimes from the king's family but not always.
In that case...

By popular vote the Queen already prevails.
You've lost your ride to the Throne on my coattails.
Though you and the Crown are parted
Don't be brokenhearted.
Maybe you'll win the vote when I've cast off my mortal veils.

[Fauxmage]

:rofl: :laugh: :rofl: :laugh: Oh this just conjures up all kinds of strange images!
Don't you think we would have lots of cute vegan princes and princesses Charmagne? :flirt:

[Oracl]

Don't you think we would have lots of cute vegan princes and princesses Charmagne? :flirt:
I imagine they'd all be recalcitrant delinquent anarchists. :rolleyes: :gum:

[Fauxmage]

And just what's wrong with recalcitrant delinquent anarchists?!? :rollingpin:

[Oracl]

:lol: Nothing, as long as they are vegans! :agree: :rock:

[Blueshark]

There was once a young lady,
Who felt proper to shave daily,
Her hair thence grew faster,
The men called her mister,
But it was dark, Sir, when I kissed her!

[Blueshark]

There was an old hag,
Saddened by times sag,
Youth smiled,
She reviled,
Lo' now, intimate with colostomy bag!

[Gliondrach]

In that case...

By popular vote the Queen already prevails.
You've lost your ride to the Throne on my coattails.
Though you and the Crown are parted
Don't be brokenhearted.
Maybe you'll win the vote when I've cast off my mortal veils.


It is the Council of Elders for the king who vote.
Of this knowledge you need to take note.
It is I they will choose,
It is you who will lose,
If not me, before you, they'd choose a goat.

[Gliondrach]

Yam Yam, like me, has a strange sense of humour.
Is it because he's really quite new here?
Or is he so clever
That none of us ever
Would understand his references peculiar?

[Gliondrach]

Aren't you flattered, Martin that I referred to you as a mensch?


I don't use that term often.

Yes, now that I see what it can mean. I am flattered. I always thought it just meant 'man'. I prefer to be referred to as a jolly good fellow. Or a good egg - not vegan, but still a compliment. Or a brick. That's with a 'B'. Or a canny lad.

[Blueshark]

Few people have true sight,
Caged spirits forever fight,
Those who are strongs,
Bounce off the wrongs,
But, beware the nervous heights!

[Fauxmage]

For the Council of Elders I don't care a whit.
Shades from the past, who don't matter one bit
To the folk of today,
who are happy and gay
Because on the Throne, I their Queen sit.

[Fauxmage]

With my faithful goat by my side,
And my head held high I stride
Right up to my Throne
Which I and I alone
Hold, til my life's eventide.

[Oracl]

With my faithful goat by my side

:shiftydvil: :D

[Blueshark]

There was a farmer from Cuba,
Who ploughed fields on his tuba,
The potatoes grooved,
The cauliflower soothed,
But the whole village moved to Montezuma!

[Blueshark]

Yes. And he's just sent another one by special messanger.

A vegan linguist called Yam Yam
In many tongues can say 'I am
A good vegan man
Who would eat seitan,
But would never dream of eating lamb.'

:hyper: Thank-you again to the messenger!

BTW There are some great poetry/limericks at the start of this thread. Very light and funny, then got slightly darker but still ever so profound!

I am of course the new master lol :pleer:

[Blueshark]

These are great funation, so I shall conjure some more!

Tell me, please, what use is a female,
They lie, fight, deceive and wail,
Dare you say?
It's all a play!
No - sir, you miss them true but not the tale.

[Gliondrach]

Indeed, what use is a female who covets a throne?
She's deceitful, a cheat and should be left alone.
This is so true
That I tell to you
If you deny it, with you I will pick a bone.

A goat would a very good ruler be.
Compared to a usurper you would see
That he would not shirk
His duties of work
And would rule with honour and majesty.

[Blueshark]

There was once a fish with knife teeth,
Whose unique skill begged belief,
Slaughtered among his kin,
For the recycle bin,
Hark, whenst mermaids sing he will dance again!

[Gliondrach]

Vegans are wonderful - they're the salt of the earth.
Vegans have compassion which is in them from birth.
They know what's right
And they take delight
In being healthy, feeling love and living with mirth.

[Fauxmage]

Can the Pretender do more than just lie and wheedle,
Or is that a phonograph with a broken needle?
Is it all a spoof?
Is there actual proof
That he's not just a commoner from Cheadle?

[Fauxmage]

There was once a fish with knife teeth,
Whose unique skill begged belief,
Slaughtered among his kin,
For the recycle bin,
Hark, whenst mermaids sing he will dance again!
:mermaid: :note: :mermaid: :note: :mermaid: :note:

[thevegantwins]

There was an old vegan mom from New Jersey
She was constantly tired and rushed but never lazy
She fed her family healthy food
Depending on her daily mood
Though no animals were used, that would be heresy!

[Gliondrach]

Who are you talking about? She must be a good mother.

[Gliondrach]

That he's not just a commoner from Cheadle?

Cheadle Hulme or Cheadle Dee is a place I've never been.
A North-East man am I as is for everyone plain to be seen.
I am also the king
With crown and ring.
These islands have a king and do not have a queen.

[Fauxmage]

The Queen is not convinced by repetition.
We want the proof behind your petition
To claim our Throne
As your very own.
Your Kingship seems a mere figment of imagination.

[Fauxmage]

I am the Queen by proven bloodline. :princess:
The Throne of the British Isles in mine. :order:
I shall never cave :mdrama:
In to any nave. :pleer:
I'd rather give my Crown to the swine. :pface: :pface: :pface:

[Gliondrach]

You say your claim comes from 'king' Billy
But he was just a Dutchman who was silly.
His wife's claim
To royal fame
Was from a usurper no more royal than a ghillie.

[Blueshark]

There was once a monkey,
Who worked as a sparky,
She lived in the cables,
Her life became fable,
Whenst, neon bananas were 'vailable!

[Fauxmage]

King William III was born into
The House of Stuart (http://www.jesus-is-lord.com/kjstuart.htm); this is true.
Great-grandson of James I,
From whom I claim, for better or worst,
My rights as Queen over all of you.

[Fauxmage]

Yam Yam, you are full of whimsy. :updn:

[Oracl]

This is a very entertaining thread! :D :yea:

[Blueshark]

Yam Yam, you are full of whimsy. :updn:

Thanks!

[Gliondrach]

The Stuarts were usurping vagabonds all
Their false dynasty ended up in a great fall.
The present pretender,
You should remember
Is on the throne by trickery, theft and gall.

[Gliondrach]

Some dog and cat food makers are callous and vile:
They lie and they cheat and sell bad food by the mile.
Their products can kill
And make our friends ill
But they go on selling them knowing this all the while.

[thevegantwins]

Sad but true. :(

[Gliondrach]

SeaWillow, with the black cat is back to stay.
Though she's been away for a year and a day
She will make up for it,
And post every bit
Of news, and whilst the sun shines, make hay.

[Gliondrach]

Jo1234 is a good vegan lover of dogs, horses and cats.
The more the merrier is Jo's motto, especially for bats.
Insects and mice
Are equally nice
To Jo1234, the vegan lover of gulls, squirrels and rats.

[Blueshark]

I see darkness and black,
I hear voices that sap,
I feel hate and fear,
But still I despair,
This is light - akin to a woman fair.

[Bowwowmeow]

That's too good for this mostly goofy thread.

[Blueshark]

She says 'Hold please'
The line does breathe,
Her occupation to direct,
And remain disconnect,
Her image immortal - she lives.

[Bowwowmeow]

Your muse must be whispering in your ear a lot right now.

[Blueshark]

Goodness gives me harm,
I am only just charm,
Look away,
But stay,
I will play, dont answer.

[Bowwowmeow]

A happy vegan is Caprita :excited:
Especially when she's eating vegan pizza. :hungry:
She left for a while :wave:
But now she's back, with a smile! :blinkwave:
And we're all very glad to re-meet'ya! :nanakiss:

[Blueshark]

On farthest shores sailed a ship,
Her crew of ruffians and misfits,
The Octupus lashed,
Wind and rain crashed,
Waters red but the oars, the oars were bloodshed.

[Blueshark]

On a random meeting today - whilst my thoughts were on some vegans past:

He gives me a smile,
And an open heart,
This is not me,
Am I now depart?
The eyes now wide -
The smile deeping
He sees the reason,
I see the spark.

[Gliondrach]

Which past vegans? Any we know?

[Blueshark]

She is now wise,
Her beauty still,
The past she sees,
For time is beans,
Why sorrow then is sorrow now.

[Bowwowmeow]

Oh I like those Yam Yam. :)

[Blueshark]

Thank-you kindly.

[Gliondrach]

This thread has been quiet for quite some time
To let it remain so would be a terrible crime.
So I put on my thinking cap,
Into my thoughts I did tap
And, lo and behold! out comes another rhyme.

[Fauxmage]

Very good! Fuzzy the Artist has been a little quiet lately too.

[Oracl]

Excellent. :thumbsup:

[Gliondrach]

I'll tell him. But it will be some time before he can paint anything. He's in a secret location watching dangerous people and gathering intelligence - not much chance to get the easel out.

[Gliondrach]

When all seems lost and nothing works
And all the world seems full of berks,
And nothing's right
And you look a fright:
Just smile and enjoy the vegan perks.

[Oracl]

Cute. :) Your creation or Fuzzy's? :rubchin:

[Gliondrach]

Cute. :) Your creation or Fuzzy's? :rubchin:

Such verse is far beyond my wit.
It wasn't me what wrote it.
'Tis Fuzzy's alone.
Alack! I moan,
To write such poetry I am not fit.

[Gliondrach]

I wouldn't condemn Bush if he was still as anti-war as his behaviour 30-odd years ago seemed to show. The reasons why he avoided active service don't matter. If he was scared that is understandable and no one should condemn him for that. But he should never have put himself in the position, or accepted a job, where he would have to send others to do what he wasn't willing to do himself. And, because he sends other people to war, I have written this just for him:

Georgy Porgy, military man,
Saluted the flag but then he ran
Away from the war,
His nerves all raw,
But now he loves his wars to plan.

[Oracl]

Agree totally! :agree:

Excellent poem. :cheer:

[Gliondrach]

Thank you.

[Gliondrach]

Christmas shoppers are shopping like mad,
To spend money on the very lastest fad.
But what about the turkeys
And the poor fatted geese?
Selfish, thoughtless people - it really is sad.

[thevegantwins]

True and moving, Martin. I was talking with Mr. TVT about that recently, how people queu up for hours to buy the latest electronic or toy of the season and the recipient is so happy for a couple of days maybe but then it is all about what to get next year. So stupid.

[Gliondrach]

Yes. But yours doesn't rhyme.

[thevegantwins]

:wigglebutt:

[Oracl]

:rofl:

[Bowwowmeow]

Yes. But yours doesn't rhyme.
Now it does. ;)


True and moving, Martini.
I was talking with Mr. TVT
about that recently,

how people queue up for hours to buy the latest electronic or toy

of the season

and the recipient is so happy
for a couple of days maybe

but then it is all about what to get next year.

So stupid.

[Gliondrach]

Very clever.

Cheat!

[Gliondrach]

BWM in the mouth of TVT puts rhymes
Which now has a melody that sweetly chimes.
But they are fake,
The mick they take.
And BWM just compounds her crimes.

[Bowwowmeow]

You've got no reason to call me a cheat.
'Twas a simple matter of editing, my sweet.
Don't expect an answer why.
All I did was add an "i".
Then I moved the phrases 'round,
So they made a rhyming sound.

[Gliondrach]

And now BWM tries to explain
But only goes further down the lane
Of deceit.
Not sweet!
That path leads to ignoble pain.

[Bowwowmeow]

The evidence is there for all to see.
There's no need to cry "deceit".
This thread is full of my poetry.
Most folks find it quite a treat.

[Oracl]

Most folks find it quite a treat.

:agree: :yea:

[thevegantwins]

That BWM might be clever and sly
But that's no reason for Martin to cry
And call her a cheat.
Is he jealous of her feat?
I don't think that statement would be a lie.

[Gliondrach]

I am not jealous of anyone's feet:
Mine own are really rather neat.
I have two of such,
Not too much.
These appendages would be hard to beat.

[thevegantwins]

Martin is at it..again.
Writing without a pen
BWM is poet extraordinaire
Without even mussing a hair
When will this battle end?

[Gliondrach]

What battle do you talk about?
I always win with a thorough rout.
I am the best
In any test.
I always win with a victory shout.

[Bowwowmeow]

Paul is back for a while, and that's good news.
But we'll have to mind our Ps and Qs.
'Cause it makes him happy
To overuse Slappy.
Who would've guessed that :slappy: was his muse?

[paul]

:nanakiss::curtsey::slappy:

[Gliondrach]

Paul is slap happy and that is true,
You'd better watch out or he'll slap you.
He means no harm,
He has some charm
But if you annoy him he'll hit you with a shoe.

[Gliondrach]

This can apply to anyone who gets a bit frustrated and angry at times:

You're not really as bad as those who are mad
And you are not as sad as those who aren't glad.
But you can be a pain
Like a picnic rain
When things don't add up the way you wish they had.

[Bowwowmeow]

Tails4wagging has joined the fun :wave:
And is now an official Naked Vaygun. ;) :wigglebutt:
With Sophie Sue
and Beckie Boo
Who've got doggy smiles for everyone. :doggygrin: :doggygrin:

[Tails4wagging]

This is true
for sophie sue
and becky boo
to join in the fun.
Naked or not,
I'll join the lot,
Showing my bot.:wigglebutt:
Now I'm done.

[Bowwowmeow]

Yay! We've got another poet! :cheer:

[Oracl]

:rofl:

[Gliondrach]

Fuzzy had better watch out.

[Gliondrach]

My reputation is second to none.
I am, indeed, the curmudgeonly one.
I like to write
Through the night
And it really is a lot of fun.

[Gliondrach]

Boyana's an aikido tumbling, fighting fan:
Throws and locks applied with great elan.
Trip, slip and down -
Boyana wins the crown
And to beat any opponent Boyana can.

[thevegantwins]

Fuzzy is a ratty old stuffed bear
Using Martin's hand as his pathetic lair
While much loved by all online
He does have a bearish whine
And a dense, clueless, vacant stare.

[Gliondrach]

Fuzzy is a true hero - and a scholarly bear.
For many millenia he has travelled everywhere.
And the more he learns,
The less his temper burns
Because what insults he gets he doesn't care.

[thevegantwins]

Insulting Fuzzy was not a nice act
He's an innocent toy, that's a fact.
His presence is appreciated here
He brings on comfort, not fear.
Maybe I should work on my tact.

:flower: :fuzzy:

[Gliondrach]

Fuzzy is unfazed by anything that people say or do.
He has seen and done so much - more than me or you
That nothing can harm
The bear whose charm
Is steadfast, and in all ways so true.

[Gliondrach]

TVT is the mother of two charming vegan tots.
Her love is unending and she loves them lots.
She's a good social worker
Who rarely is a shirker
And she cooks good vegan food in pans and pots.

[Gliondrach]

GoodeOne has been quiet of late after starting well
Could it be because there is nothing important to tell?
But importance doesn't matter:
Just post any old chatter
Our need for gossip and nonsense to quell.

[Gliondrach]

Kentucky? Who could that be?

All are welcome from the 50 American states.
They can come here and bring all their mates.
As long as they eschew meat
They can chew any kind of treat
Because using animal products we all hates.

[Gliondrach]

If Kentuckians are here in this thread reading this
And aren't vegans yet, then they won't go amiss
If they give up meat,
And learn what to eat
And then become vegans so they can live in bliss.

[thevegantwins]

There was a vegan mum from England
Who ate more than twigs, berries and sand
She was a vegan with taste
Who felt it was a waste
That vivesectors possessed two hands!

:o

[Bowwowmeow]

Our forum was closed for so long,
Because everything seemed to have gone wrong!
Fixing it took forever,
And I thought we would never
Get back online, where we belong!

[Oracl]

:agree: :thumbsup:

[Gliondrach]

Laura has done a sterling job in getting us back online.
We should remember this if we want to complain or whine:
That, but for her there would not be
A Naked Vegan Community.
A place for us to help make the vegan message shine.

[Gliondrach]

Pob and Tabitha are soon due to be married.
They've taken their time but have not tarried.
They'll very soon be wed,
Vegan nosh they'll be fed
And over the threshold Tabs will be carried.

[Oracl]

Nice ones, Fuzzy! :cheer:

[paul]

All so good.

[Gliondrach]

Very good, but inaccurate.

Fuzzy does just whatever he wants to do.
No one can stop him, especially not you.
He is his own bear
Of that be aware:
He comes and goes to and fro, fro and to.

[Gliondrach]

:D :slappy:

Tails, that is just a picture you see.
It a picture of Fuzzy but is not he.
He does what he wants
Despite your taunts.
Remember, he is he and I is me.

[Oracl]

:rofl:

[Gliondrach]

Cave bears never have any pains for long,
They are very healthy and immensely strong.
Fuzzy's always cheerful.
He is never fearful.
He is often heard to break into song.

[Gliondrach]

Fuzzy no longer lives in a cave
He lives in a house - he's not a knave.
Clever and urbane,
Wise and sane,
He is also strong and very brave.

[Gliondrach]

He has his own bedroom and HQ.
The furniture there is quite nearly new.
He is his own bear
And it is not fair
That 'he is owned' was said by you. :no:

[Gliondrach]

Fuzzy is away on a mission most perilous
Fighting to quell a rebellion most querulous.
So I tell every seeker
I'm his appointed speaker
Even though, at times, he can be most garrulous.

[Gliondrach]

What is this about a master you speak?
Fuzzy has no master no matter how meek.
No one controls him,
His wish is his whim,
And no secrets of his will I ever leak.

[Gliondrach]

The warrior's stuffing is more than secure,
He fights all his foes with a heart that is pure.
He will always vanguish
His foes, who will languish:
His victories are certain of that I am sure.

[Bowwowmeow]

Fuzzy has belly ache,
he told me so.
Because you hold him
and wont let go.
:rofl:
So the tummy of the bard
Is being squeezed a tad too hard?
:fuzzy:

[Gliondrach]

Fuzzy the warrior bard is never squeezed tight.
To try such a thing is to risk a bruising fight.
Do not provoke him
If you value your limb,
Because if you do, you'll be in for a terrible fright.

[Gliondrach]

Many naked vegans have gone AWOL.
Where they've gone to, no one can tell.
They must come back,
Or we'll have a lack
And for the forum it will not bode well.

[Gliondrach]

It's true that Fuzzy has many creative talents.
He might find a way to entice the miscreants
Who are staying away
For many a day,
But we should all help bring back the malcontents.

[Gliondrach]

I've now put fire fox on my computer
And the search box looks much cuter.
But will it work?
Or will it shirk?
If it's a berk I'll punch it on the hooter.

[Fauxmage]

We've had a bunch of new members join,
So now we've got lots of new poems to coin...

[Gliondrach]

How much to charge to pen a poem?
We'll have to write so those who know 'em
Will pay a fiver to see the verse
As long as it is not worse
Than a ditty that makes folks groan.

Well, what do you expect after a couple of minutes?

[Gliondrach]

Well done, and well said. But, are you trying to take over the poetry section as well as the painting one? I'll have to get my paints out to show how good I am.

[Gliondrach]

But I charge for things that're worth a lot.
'Tis not much to charge for what is got.
It might not be cheap,
But it's not a great leap
To expect fair pay for verses so hot.

[Gliondrach]

Why should a poet as good as what I am
Pay others for what amounts to spam?
I did not ask
You to do that task,
Or to write a poem as sweet as rhubarb jam.

[Gliondrach]

The FreshVegan can make delicious things to eat
Which are so good that they are a real treat.
He is a skilled cook
Who's writen a book,
And none of his meals contain any meat.

[Gliondrach]

Fauxmage has given us this great forum
That's ours to use as long as we don't bore 'em
Who come here to find
Some peace of mind.
So thank you Faux, for a forum much morem. :applause:

[Gliondrach]

Conor's a good boy who can stay quite dry
When he really wants to, and and that's no lie.
But he sometimes forgets
And the carpet he wets.
So we must encourage him a bit harder to try.

[Gliondrach]

It's Friday night and some of us still here
Have nowhere to go and no one near.
But who cares a fig?
We are just too big
To bother with meatheads supping their beer.

[Gliondrach]

When vegans fall out they should remember one thing:
Those who wish us harm could well be watching.
So bury the hatchet;
Don't increase the ratchet.
Just let go of bad feelings and misunderstanding. :hungry:

[Gliondrach]

Posters come, posters go: vegans go on whatever.
People join, people leave but it's true that whenever
Some go, others will come.
Some post, others stay mum.
But remember, Saucy Vegan will continue forever.

[Fauxmage]

...
But remember, Saucy Vegan will continue forever.
As long as I can find a way
All of the monthly bills to pay. ;)

[Gliondrach]

As long as I can find a way
Bill the blackmailer to pay. ;)

What does he have on you?

[Gliondrach]

Bunny and Yam Yam have come back to the fold.
Paul is posting things again it can now be told.
Our happy little band
Will continue to expand
And the forum will one day win Olympic forum gold. :eat:

[Fauxmage]

I know a vegan called Martin
Who never seems to stop fartin'
He loves to boast
Of his beans on toast
But my nose just won't stop smartin'!

[Vinnie]

This is a good board
That we all like
My avatar is a sword
But it almost was a bike. :D :beanie:

[Gliondrach]

Good one, Vinnie!

Vinnie put pen to paper and a poem he wrote.
He writes about bikes, swords and here, I quote,
He said this is a good board,
And also, Good Lord!
He's another who's joined us on the poetry boat.

[Fauxmage]

Yay more poets! :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:

[Gliondrach]

But where are all the others? Don't they know about the prize?

[Fauxmage]

Oh there's a prize? :bhead:

[Gliondrach]

Yes. An emerald the size of a pigeon's egg.

Who will be the next one to write a ditty?
It needn't be good - just make it pretty.
Write the words in a line.
Keep going - you'll be fine,
If you're stuck, write about your pup or kitty.

[Bunny]

These poems are really quite mad
(You notice I don't dare say bad)
You write lots of verse
It could be much worse
The fact that it rhymes is quite rad!

[Gliondrach]

Bunny is funny when she writes like this.
Her next contribution I won't want to miss.
It might be about food
But it won't be rude
And I'm really quite sure it'll not make us hiss.

[Gliondrach]

This won't rhyme if you read in Southern English.


Heather Mills has opened a caff.
It's a lovely vegan eating gaff.
You sit on seats,
Have lots of eats,
And enjoy the food and have a laugh.

[FatPassionFishPoet]

There was a young Omni called Jill,
Who one day made her way up a hill,
When she got to the top,
A cow fell with a plop,
And she was squashed in the name of Free Will.

There was a sweet veggie called Ben,
Who made quick and good friends with a hen,
'Fore hen went to the slaughter,
Ben was swift and he caught her,
And neither was seen e'er again.

Ahaha. I don't think they came out as well as I'd have liked, haha. I'll try again later when I don't have tons of work I'm procrastinating over...

[Gliondrach]

:rock: :applause: Another Saucy Vegan poet. You can now put FSVPS after your name (Fellow of the Saucy Vegan Poetry Society).

[FatPassionFishPoet]

YAY! *Feels special*

I'll write more tomorrow...I have many boring lessons...finally...something to do :P

[gabbles]

I have long wanted to be an FSVPS.
I'm a poet too, now you see, no less.
What must I do
To be like you
And get the letters to prove my success?


With thanks to someone with the initial G who helped a bit. But not much.

[Gliondrach]

You are now a Fellow. Having a poem included in this select company is entitlement enough.

You should tell this 'G' person to be more helpful.

[gabbles]

Do we Fellows wear gowns or robes?

[FatPassionFishPoet]

I have long wanted to be an FSVPS.
I'm a poet too, now you see, no less.
What must I do
To be like you
And get the letters to prove my success?


With thanks to someone with the initial G who helped a bit. But not much.

*Giggles*

Love it ^_^

[FatPassionFishPoet]

There was a young man from Kentucky,
Who inwardly thought he was lucky,
But one day was found dead,
From a pain in his head,
After consuming a pot full of ducky.

...Nasty. Mmmph.

[Gliondrach]

:D Serves him right. If he hadn't died of head disease most likely heart disease would have claimed him.

[Gliondrach]

Do we Fellows wear gowns or robes?

Yes. You'll have to wear yours at your induction into the Society, where you'll learn the secret handshakes and passwords. And you'll have to wear your robes at formal dinners and ceremonies.

The robes are black and emerald green.

[FatPassionFishPoet]

There was an old man from the sand,
I smiled as I shook his frail hand,
But when I learned later,
He wore alligator,
I quickly departed the land.

Haha. Oh dear, I'm actually having too much fun writing these things now O_o

[Gliondrach]

Gabbles has joined the ranks of the Fellows
With a poem which his virtures it bellows.
Where's his next
Poetic text
To prove his brain's not made of jelloes?

[gabbles]

My brain is made of brain.

Those robes must make us look very important.

[Gliondrach]

Those robes must make us look very important.

Yes they do. :rock:

[Gliondrach]

It's become a tradition here for new members to get their own limerick. A few still need them but here are the ones for Ayashi Foxtail, TurquoiseBear and FatPassionFishPoet:

Ayashi likes rabbits and painting on glass.
Her vegan credentials are really first class.
She's very healthy,
Soon to be wealthy:
From painting she'll make lots of lovely brass.


Lilie is new here from sunny south Cal.,
A new vegan member who's quite a gal.
Her friends don't support her
They way that they ought-er
But here she has many a new vegan pal.


Rachel on the forum arrived with a bounce.
No meat will she eat, not even one ounce.
History's her thing
And archae-digging.
In debate, meat eaters she can easily trounce.

:curtsey2:

[FatPassionFishPoet]

*Giggles lots*

Must say that I rather love 'my' poem :D

[Gliondrach]

:curtsey: :eat:

[Gliondrach]

Here we go, three for the price of one.

Vinnie still needs a limerick and so do a few other people.

BritVeganGuy wants to buy some new shoes
But not a pair made from the skin of moos.
We can easily find
More peace of mind
By buying footwear from skin cows don't lose.

BritVeganGuy wants to buy some new shoes
But not some from skin that cows had to lose.
We can easily find
More peace of mind
If in buying we consider everyting we choose.

BritVeganGuy is quite a keen music fan
And, I believe, also a guitar-playing man.
Cooking he likes,
And also psychs,
He wants to eat raw so won't need a pan.

[Gliondrach]

SeaWillow Jean has a cat with lamp-like eyes.
She loves her Jack and him she does idolise.
She once booed Stella,
But someone did tell her
And her opinion of McCartney she did revise.

[Gliondrach]

Boogabaah, we all know, must have the last word.
To think of beating her is really quite absurd.
She cycles a lot
And she has got
To say what she wants and likes to be heard.

[Gliondrach]

We have a new member called Evergreen
Who, having looked around has now seen
A forum that's easy,
Light and breezy,
Where vegans feel they should've always been.

[Gliondrach]

Doughnut is no nut and that's no lie.
This vegan's a staunch fighter who I
have learned is tough
and, if that's not enough,
That doughnuts, though soft, are never-say-die.

[Gliondrach]

Myria types with keyboard-eating babe on knee.
Since becoming vegan, she's changed for all to see.
She feels greatly soothed,
Her health much improved,
And now she's as healthy as healthy can be.

[Gliondrach]

Catfriend lives on the Oregon coast
With Danny the cat who likes to boast
That Catfried and he
Like to drink tea,
Especially when they have it with toast.

[Bowwowmeow]

At the end of every day
The skunks come out to spray.
They sure are cute!
But when they toot
I wish they were further away.

[Gliondrach]

:D :skunk:

[Bowwowmeow]

There's a clever vegan called Jed
Who mixed up a tasty spread.
He called it fauxmage,
And served up a splodge
To all of his friends, on their bread.

(I just Tweeted this. *hint hint*) :whistle:

[Bowwowmeow]

I think it is long past time
That someone made nagev a rhyme.
He's a most logical fellow
Who seems very mellow
And finds simple living sublime.

[Gliondrach]

(I just Tweeted this. *hint hint*) :whistle:

At what do you hint and hope we do?
Can this be told to us by you?
What is this tweet?
How do we meet?
Can we by you be guided through?

[Gliondrach]

I think it is long past time
That someone made nagev a rhyme.



But who could possibly append
A poem for Nagev that would end
Only after saying all
That does befall
A vegan with a giant shark friend?

[Gliondrach]

Do any vegans who've come here late
Need a rhyme for them that does relate
The things they do,
What they hold true,
And the sort of life they want to create?

[nagev]

You people are silly. :)

[Gliondrach]

Though we might be silly or even mad
Our hearts are good and we are not bad.
But meat eaters eat
Pigs' ears and feet.
The thought of which makes us so sad.